Laziness and Weight Loss
When it comes to setting goals for weight loss and getting fit, how you deal with laziness or procrastination can make or break your success. Laziness or procrastination seems to plague most people’s lives: hitting the snooze alarm over and over, not doing the dishes, late bill paying, starting projects without finishing, going to the gym, etc... When you ask yourself why you haven’t followed through yet, you may just excuse it as being lazy, but the conversation may continue in your head; feelings of anxiety, recrimination, a sense of failure, all may set in. That’s because what you may not realize, is that there is a whole behavioral equation underneath, that dictates what you do. So, today, we are going to unlock that “laziness,” lay it out, and begin to find ways to minimize or rethink it.
When it gets right down to it, most of the afore-mentioned procrastinations might not have happened, if you were feeling at your best. The body/ mind connection is real, and strong, and plays a significant role in how each of us sees ourselves, and how we take action to run our lives. So, let's first start out by looking into underlying reasons why we may, or may not, get to the gym, and / or eat healthy.
Negative Baggage
The first reason why you might not go to the gym or eat healthy, is likely due to negative emotions, primarily, fear and shame. The fear of taking too much time away from staying on top of your game, whatever it is, might distract you from tending to your health goals, or taking time to relax the way you’d like to, ie; “I’ve been putting in a lot of time at work, going to the gym would be more work, I should be relaxing so I can be at my best tomorrow.” Even though you might have read all the benefits of fitness and eating healthy, your brain still might deem it an
imposition on your time. After 10 years of working out, part of me still feels that taking time to workout is an imposition on my time, even though I know it’s not, ie; when I’m working out at home, I feel that I should be getting the laundry done, or cleaning the house.
Fear
Fear is an instinct that has evolved from prehistoric man’s fight to stay alive in the raw elements. Today, our fear for our physical survival may not be foremost in our lives, but now our survival may depend on our abilities, our looks, our connections; what other people think of us, and how well we can compete with others. Whether we are afraid of wasting time, getting hurt, avoiding pain, not knowing what to do, embarrassing ourselves, failing, etc., it may seem irrational, but that fear is real in our head, and it is best to acknowledge it.
Shame
The other negative emotion that you have to deal with is shame.
Have you ever felt anxious going to the gym? I still do. When you look around and see many people that are in shape, it is hard to not compare and judge yourself. This negative emotion that you feel is called shame. Shame is powerful because it is internal, you don’t talk about it, it’s usually left to fester, and you judge yourself. In this hilarious show I watch, called “Big Mouth,” shame is depicted as a ghoulish spirit called the Shame Wizard. The Shame Wizard went around the neighborhood like a judgmental friend, watching all of the characters actions, and then started whispering in their ear to give them a “healthy dose” of self-loathing. He was really made out to be the bad guy at the beginning, and everybody started to hate him. However, toward the finale, the newly humbled Shame Wizard implored: “Perhaps I’m too harsh sometimes, but I only want you to be a better person.” I finally understood the role of shame, and that he was merely trying to help the characters. Shame is a very natural feeling to have, but sometimes shame goes too far. That’s when it needs to be tempered with empathy and respect for one’s vulnerability. The last thing that’s holding you back is the past and future oriented selves.
Past and Future Oriented Selves
The risk of heart disease, diabetes, heart attack, and surgery might scare you, and you would think that it’d be a motivator for you to eat healthy and workout. However, unconsciously, your mind brushes it off as a problem for your future self, and decides to procrastinate. You might also think that the mental image of your “dream body” can help you keep at it, because your feelings tell you, that's when you’ll feel attractive and confident. However, when you are one or two months in, and you realize that this process takes much longer than expected, you might quit. What that tells us is that your future-oriented self, and the future reward is not something that keeps you motivated. Then, if you start back up, six months later, you might burden yourself with the constant thought of “what would have happened if I had kept going.” This is your past- oriented self speaking and it is always trying to look at the what ifs. Both these types of thoughts, are not the kinds of motivators that will get you in shape.
““Worry gives a small thing a big shadow.””
You may have heard this one a lot, but being present, or focused, is one of the keys to keeping you going. It doesn’t mean that you can just flip a switch, and all of a sudden you are present-in-the-moment, but learning, and consistently practicing meditation or mindfulness exercises, can help you learn to be focused in the present, or present-oriented. Then you can be on your game, reach your goals, without so many mental interferences.
Solving the Problem
Laziness is a factor in the behavioral equation that happens in your mind. Each decision you make, to choose what you perceive will get you what you want, requires some mental balancing of the pros and cons of your actions on how to get results. The choice to go to the gym today is made by balancing options on that “pros and cons scale,” and depending on the pros and cons you are weighing (benefits/drawbacks/emotions), it can tip positively toward you working out, or negatively, toward you skipping. The behavioral equation happens very fast and most of the time, unconsciously. You can try to logically think through the pros and cons, trying to convince yourself to act one way or another, but most of the time it doesn’t work. What you may need to do, is talk to somebody, to realize and work through your emotions. Then you might find you need to practice some form of meditation to become more present- in- the- moment. Then decision making can become so much easier. If you need someone to talk to, or you need help getting started, reach out. Your time is valuable, and so is your life!